Towne Club root beer

Background information: (from the website) "Towne Club first entered the market in the mid-1960s, debuting its well-loved “Pop Shops” in Detroit. The Pop Shops offered an incredible number of soda flavors, much more than what was typically seen in grocery stores. The assortment of flavors was known to inspire curiosity and enjoyment among patrons. At Pop Shops, visitors entered the store, grabbed a sturdy wooden crate, and walked around the various stacks of pop—creating a memorable in-store experience. Customers would be encouraged to bring back empty bottles as well as cases, creating a virtuous cycle of experiences.

Towne Club is owned and bottled in Detroit by Intrastate Distributors, Inc. (IDI). IDI owns other beverages, including Frostie and Kist.

Towne Club is made for all Michiganders and bottled with love in Detroit."

Product details: 16 fl. oz.  Bottled by: Towne Club Bev. Corp., Detroit, Michigan 48234. 215 calories, 42g sugar. Glass bottle with twist off top. www.towneclub.com

Ingredients: Carbonated Water, Pure Cane Sugar, Sodium Benzoate (preservative), Citric Acid, Natural and Artificial Flavors.


My thoughts: You're at the club. You see a hottie across the way. Your eyes meet. They walk over, the pulse of the music pounding in rhythm to your heartbeat as the rest of the people and the sounds fade away into a background haze. Is this the one you take home, or is it the one you "I gotta run to the bathroom" and ditch? Just what kind of party in your mouth is happening with this Towne Club?

This root beer is the life of the party, with it's strong, rooty sassafrass taste that root beer is known for. It's got some fancy dance moves, ones that seem familiar. It's entertaining, though not entirely innovative. Behind the strong initial impression, there are little hints of vanilla and wintergreen. And as the song ends, the impressions slowly and pleasantly fade, leaving a good taste behind. This root beer may not have mastered the complexity of salsa dancing, or the technical prowess of a master break dancer, but its club party style is fun nonetheless.

Speaking of sweet dance moves, this one has solid sugar levels. Not too syrupy, with just the right amount of sugar. While I prefer my carbonation to bump, grind and twerk energetically over my tongue, this is a little classier, with a little more controlled roiling and jumping effervescence and only moderate amounts of carbonation twerking. While some pickup lines can be terribly grating, this one is fairly smooth. Maybe not the smoothest, but good enough that I'd say "yes."

Well, if this root beer is a night out at the Towne Club, then maybe I've been missing out on this clubbing thing. It's a lot of fun, something I'd be up for doing again, though it wouldn't be my nightly routine. This root beer is good for a hookup, but if you're looking for a long term situation, there are other fish in the sea that would serve you better.

Rating: B
flavor: B
aftertaste: B
sweetness: B+
smoothness: B-
carbonation: B

Bawls Guarana root beer

Background information: (from the website) "BAWLS Guarana all started as a class project to provide college students with a great tasting alternative to coffee. Keep in mind this was a time before the term “energy drink” was around. The idea: in addition to caffeine, use the natural power of the Guarana Berry, not yet known to the US, to fuel the drink. 

In 1996, BAWLS Guarana was released upon the world in the signature cobalt blue glass bottle making it one of the first drinks in the USA to use a natural energy supplement.

Turns out, BAWLS’ great taste, long lasting energy, bumpy non-slip glass bottle, and fun name, just so happened to be a perfect concoction. The blue bottle fuel soon became the go-to energy source. 25 years later we still have the best fans around! "

Product details: 10 fl. oz.  Manufactured for BAWLS, Twinsburg, OH 44087. 140 calories, 36g sugar. Glass bottle with pry off top. www.bawls.com

Ingredients: Carbonated Water, High Fructose Corn Syrup, Caramel Color, Citric Acid, Natural Guarana Extract, Sodium Benzoate (as a preservative), Caffeine, Natural and Artificial Flavors. Warning: This product contains high levels of Caffeine.


My thoughts: I have to admit, I like root beer. I'm sure that comes as a surprise to many of you. Having lived in Brazil for a couple years, I also am a big fan of Guaraná. I had never considered combining the two into a single beverage, as the flavors don't seem like they'd really go together. So, will this drink result in a "goooooooooooooolaso!" or "perna de pau"? Read on to see who takes home the cup!

Well, I'm a bit surprised. There is no hint of guaraná flavor to be found. This one tastes like a straight up root beer, with a strong rooty flavor bolstered by vanilla and decent level of wintergreen, not coming across too minty while providing the cooling effect. It's not the most complex flavor profile, but a bit heartier than your average root beer. The aftertaste provides a nice roll off of the main flavor as it fades, but no other subtle spices make themselves known. I enjoy the cooling sensation that lingers from the mint.

One of the first things I noticed upon trying this is that the carbonation level is excellent. When it comes to my effervescence, I prefer the kind of large, biting bubbles that prickle the tongue, and that's exactly what I get with this. Considering how the carbonation attacked my tongue, it's actually a fairly smooth root beer, with a subtle creaminess following the bubbles as they dance down my throat. It's not the creamiest, or smoothest, but strikes a pretty nice balance. Sugar levels are adequate, though my mouth felt a bit more syrupy than I prefer. Perhaps it would be better served by using cane sugar instead of high fructose corn syrup, but whatever it is, there's some room for improvement there.

So, does Bawls score a 6:1 blowout win? No. But there's no need to go down to penalty shots, as it manages to secure a decent win against the rival team. It's taking home the regional cup, but isn't quite ready to take home the world cup of root beers. It scores a gol instead of a golaso, putting the bawl into the back of the net in a convincing manner, but not worthy of the "goal of the week" award.

Rating: B
flavor: B
aftertaste: B
sweetness: C+
smoothness: B-
carbonation: A+

HEB Old Fashioned root beer

Background information: (from the website) "You don’t have to be from Texas to know that nothing beats the taste of a refreshing, ice‑cold sip of H‑E‑B Old Fashioned Root Beer Soda! This uniquely flavored drink delivers seriously delicious taste, and is perfect with home style BBQ, poured over ice cream, or just straight from the fridge."

Product details: 20 fl. oz.  Made with pride and care for H-E-B, San Antonio, TX 78204. 270 calories, 74g sugar.  Plastic bottle with twist off top. www.heb.com

Ingredients: Carbonated water, high fructose corn syrup, caramel color, potassium benzoate and potassium sorbate (preservatives), natural and artificial flavor, citric acid.


My thoughts: Continuing with my branching out to non-glass-bottled root beers, here's the in-house HEB brand. HEB is a Texas grocery store chain, so this one can't be found in other states. We'll see if that means you're missing out or not. I also have to admit that this one sat around for quite a while and I only noticed the "best by" date was almost a year ago, something I looked at after taking the first swig and finding no fizz at all.

As far as flavor is concerned, this is a run of the mill root beer. It has the generic rooty flavor with wintergreen. It's not what I'd consider a "minty" root beer, but is a little more noticeable than some of the others. I don't mind it at all, and I generally try to steer clear of the overly minty, toothpasty flavor of the stronger mints. There isn't much to be discovered in the aftertaste, as they seem to have eschewed any other notes of spices.

The 74g of sugar is right in line with the proportionality of the usual 12oz bottles I drink and it has an appropriately sugary feel to it.  As I mentioned at the top of my thoughts, this one is past the "best by" date and I assume the total lack of carbonation is due to that, so I can't offer a fair evaluation at this time (I'll update if I find myself in Texas again). Smoothness is also nearly impossible to judge, as it's typically intertwined with the level of carbonation, though this one lacks the creamy sensation even when flat, so it's not a top-tier creaminess contender.

Well, with what information I have, this is a perfectly adequate root beer that is more or less the same as any other big grocery store chain generic branded drink. Nothing worth getting excited about, but perfectly serviceable in a pinch.

Rating: C-
flavor: C-
aftertaste: C-
sweetness: B
smoothness: n/a
carbonation: n/a

1927 Soda Co. root beer

Background information: The 7-Eleven website makes no mention of this drink. The 1927 Soda Co. brand name comes from 7-11 originally starting up in 1927 as an ice house storefront before becoming Tote'm Stores from 1928-1946. This is likely a rebadged third party produced beverage.

Product details: 20 fl. oz.  Distributed by 7-Eleven, Inc. Irving, TX 75063. 290 calories, 72g sugar.  Plastic bottle with twist off top.


Ingredients: Carbonated water, sugar, caramel color, sodium benzoate (preservative), natural and artificial flavor.


My thoughts: Well, I've been having a tough time finding glass bottled root beers I haven't tried before, so I'm branching out a bit. This one is a root beer made for 7-11 convenience stores and comes in a regular plastic bottle. I'm keeping my expectations in check, as I don't expect a convenience store chain to really push the envelope of root beer flavor.

Okay, they definitely went with a wintergreen vibe. The root beer flavor is a bit flat and so the minty dominates. It's not bad, but it's not exactly what I look for in a root beer. The wintergreen isn't too intense so much as it's noticeable due to the weakness of the rooty taste. The aftertaste lets some vanilla show through, so I actually find it to have a very pleasant aftertaste.

The 72g of sugar may seem extremely high compared to the other root beers I've tested, but keep in mind that this is a 20oz bottle rather than the usual 12oz, so proportionally the sugar levels are right in line with the others. As such, it isn't too overly syrupy and at least uses real sugar. Carbonation, on the other hand, is abysmal. The first swig after opening was promising, but all the subsequent ones were almost completely flat. Where did all the carbonation go? It's hard to gauge smoothness with a complete absence of carbonation, but it does seem to have a decently creamy feel to it.

Consider me unimpressed. A mediocre flavor combined with terrible carbonation levels leave this one off my list. In spite of the good aftertaste, it's not one I'll drink again. Hopefully some of the upcoming plastic bottled and canned root beers can compete at least a little bit.
Rating: D
flavor: C-
aftertaste: B
sweetness: B
smoothness: C
carbonation: F-

Saint Arnold root beer

Background information: (from the website): "We noticed that we had a lot of families attending our tours with their children. As giving the kids beer, while legal in the state of Texas as long as they were with their parents, was frowned upon, we decided we needed an alternative. Root beer seemed like a fun idea.

And so the research began. Making root beer is much more of an immediate gratification process compared to beer. You heat up some water to dissolve the sugar, then you cool it down and add the root extracts. Most of the extracts are from real plants, but some, such as sassafrass, have pesky carcinogens in them and thus we opted to replace those with artificial flavors. We developed a good root beer base, but we wanted a great root beer so we started playing around with small amounts of other natural flavors. We finally found one that worked great and went with that. We could tell you what it is, but then we'd have to kill you. If we did tell you, you would immediately recognize it. Nobody has come up with it though without being prompted.

We use all cane sugar in our root beer which is stupidly expensive because of government controls on sugar pricing and imports. It creates a great mouthfeel to the root beer though and gives a much fuller sweetness than the thin sweet taste one gets with high fructose corn syrup.

We actually make no money on our root beer. We make it for fun and put no effort into selling it. Sales continue to climb on it even without our trying though. Oh well.

Strange fact: drinking root beer gives you very refreshing burps. It's the wintergreen."

Product details: 12 fl. oz.  Bottled by Saint Arnold Brewing Company, Houston, Texas 77020. 140 calories, 36g sugar.  Glass bottle with pry off top. www.http://www.saintarnold.com/


Ingredients: Water, sugar, root beer extract (water, caramel color gum arabic, yucca concentrate, propylene glycol, ethyl alcohol, sodium benzoate, citric acid), sparkling foam (water, yucca extract, sodium benzoate), sodium benzoate (preservative), phosphoric acid.


My thoughts: Forgive me father, for I have sinned. It has been seven months since my last root beer. I am lusting after some new root beer and want to gluttonously consume them. I envy my neighbor who has a cold root beer in his hand and greedily want to hoard all the beverage for me, but I have been too slothful to acquire this nectar of the gods. I'm proud to say I now have one to drink, and if anyone tries to take it from me, they will face my wrath!

Bless me with your -WHOA! That's a lot of wintergreen! Yes, this is one minty root beer, with the main flavor of the day being wintergreen. I don't know if it's just been so long since I've had a root beer, but I don't mind the overwhelming mintiness as much as I usually do. Often they remind me of toothpaste, but this one not so much. There is a decent sassafras flavor underneath there, so it's definitely a root beer, however it's a little overwhelmed. There is a nice natural herbal and vanilla undertone, but again, it's overpowered by the wintergreen. The aftertaste does let these weaker flavors show off a tiny bit more.

Carbonation is pretty weak. Not a whole lot of fizz or bite to this one, which is a letdown. It comes across a bit flat for my preference. It is fairly creamy, however (thanks yucca extract!!!), so has a pleasant smoothness to it, though that may be helped along by the lack of carbonation. I'm always looking for that holy grail of sharp, biting carbonation with a creamy froth to smooth things out. This one is missing the first half of that equation. The sweetness is pretty good and I was surprised that it felt just a tiny bit sugary even though it runs on the lower end of the sugar content spectrum. Strange indeed.

So, is this one getting in through the pearly gates or condemned to burn in an everlasting pit of flames? I don't think it deserves either status. It's not a bad root beer, but it certainly isn't worthy of being exalted either. I'd drink another if it was offered, but won't go out of my way to buy again.
Rating: C
flavor: C
aftertaste: C
sweetness: B-
smoothness: B
carbonation: D+

Gene Simmons Moneybag root beer

Background information: (from the website): "My Moneybag sodas are made only with the most elite of ingredients. This is soda royalty!!! If you have expensive taste, drink Moneybag!"

Aside from this short blurb, the website seems to be quite light on actual information.


Product details: 12 fl. oz.  Gene Simmons Company. 180 calories, 45g sugar (bottle says "45mg" but I'm pretty certain that's a typo).  Glass bottle with twist off top. www.http://www.genesimmonsmoneybag.com/


Ingredients: Carbonated water, cane sugar, citric acid, sodium benzoate (used as a preservative), natural flavour and caramel color.


My thoughts: (note- October 2026: It appears this root beer has been reformulated, as I recently bought a bottle -forgetting I had reviewed it before- so I decided to use it in a float. I poured most of it into the float but gave the last little bit a taste only to discover that it's not at all what I reviewed previously. No hint of wintergreen and it had a very strong and creamy vanilla taste. I didn't have enough left to do a full review, so I'll need to revisit this one and give it a proper review update.)

A root beer brought to us from legendary KISS rock and roller Gene Simmons? Sure, I'll give it a try. I can only hope it rocks my mouth like KISS rocked the Popcorn Club on January 30, 1973.

After my last root beer, it was nice to once again have a strong, rooty sassafras taste. It leans a little more towards the candy root beer flavor, with less emphasis on subtle notes of other spices, but there is wintergreen in there. It's not necessarily doing anything special, but it has the basics down. The aftertaste is pleasant, with the wintergreen growing a little more noticeable, but never too strong, and the rooty taste slowly fading.

It is a little on the sugary side from the ingredient list, but not any more so than any other average root beer. I do like how strong the carbonation is, with fairly aggressive bubbles initially though they fade to average by the last third of the bottle. It's not super smooth up front due to the strong carbonation, but become smoother as the bottle empties. Strong carbonation is generally a tradeoff with smoothness, and this does a decent job. It's not super creamy, but good.

Well, it didn't quite rock my face off the way KISS was known to rock their concerts, but it is a solid, just above average root beer. And some days that's all I need. It doesn't quite compete with the best out there, but I wouldn't hesitate to grab one of these out of the fridge. I also have to note that I find it interesting that Gene made his own root beer, seeing as how there's already a KISS Army branded root beer in existence (and one that seems to have similar flavor characteristics).
Rating: C+
flavor: C+
aftertaste: C
sweetness: B-
smoothness: B-
carbonation: B+

Ramblin' Butterscotch root beer

Background information: (from the Monarch website) "A quick history of Ramblin' Root Beer. Following its introduction in 1979 Ramblin' became one of the most popular root beers in America.

The vintage brand's first commercial featured a cameo by a young Sarah Jessica Parker, and the accompanying jingle, "Ramblin' Root Beer's something more!" would be in the minds of Americans for years to come.

Today, with a lineup of new flavors and fresh, new package designs, the best root beer is back and brought friends along to remind the passionate fans what they've been missing."

So yeah, the website is pretty light on information. Not the worst I've seen (there have been some extremely sparse websites), but very basic.


Product details: 12 fl. oz.  Bottled by Rocket Fizz under the authority of The Monarch Beverage Co., Inc. Atlanta, GA 30326. 150 calories, 37g sugar.  Glass bottle with twist off top. www.rocketfizz.com


Ingredients: Carbonated Water, Cane Sugar, Caramel Color, Potassium Benzoate (as preservative), Natural Flavor, Quillaia Extract, and Phosphoric Acid.

My thoughts: Having reviewed the regular Ramblin' root beer as well as the Ramblin' Maple root beer, I have a pretty good idea of what to expect from this one. Ramblin' has never been strong on the rootiness, with a thin, watery sensation to the root beer flavor. So we'll see if the tradition continues.

Whereas the Maple variation had a very strong scent to it, there is only a subtle hint of butterscotch to the smell of this one. I like butterscotch, so expect this to be good and it's... *UGGH!* It's terrible! The butterscotch tastes like chemicals. I can't quite identify what it is, but it's awful. There is a slight butterscotch taste to it, but it's overwhelmed by the chemical taste. Gross. The aftertaste isn't much better, but a hint of rooty sassafras taste comes through.

Like it's predecessors, sweetness is pretty good, but it's hard to get a great grasp on it as I can't get past the horrible taste. Carbonation is good, with small, moderately aggressive bubbles. I don't know how well that carbonation sticks around through the bottle as I couldn't get more than about a quarter of the way through this one. While it does have quillaia extract, it isn't as smooth or creamy as I would expect and continues the streak of disappointment with this drink.

I'm pretty sure I've finished all the bottles of root beer I've tested except for one or two. This one gets the great distinction of being added to the list. I would, under no circumstance, recommend this one. Major fail.


Rating: F
flavor: F-
aftertaste: F-
sweetness: B
smoothness: C
carbonation: B+